Friday, December 10, 2010

How to Grow Up and Rule the World by Vordak the Incomprehensible

I was immediately intrigued by How to Grow Up and Rule the World, as growing up to rule the world is the ambition of numerous youngsters.  As an educator, I feel it is my role to nurture my students' ambitions and encourage children in whatever career path they might choose.  I hoped that Vordak the Incomprehensible would prove to be Vordak the Invaluable as a resource for students showing evil tendencies.

Now, don't get me wrong, there is some excellent information here about evil lairs, evil organizations, minions, instruments of evil, and diabolically clever yet extremely slow-acting death traps.  But the more I read, the more questions arose.  So I decided to use my Twitter account to contact Vordak directly via his Twitter account.  Here is our correspondence, with occasional commentary and added information.

Reasonable enough.  I have a very similar memories.  (But I still can't find it on the map.)

Again, very reasonable.  Ice fishing is pretty big in these parts.

The links aren't live in these Twitter screenshots, but the information I referenced above is about a Wisconsin gentleman who survived a plane crash thanks to his cheesehead.  See for yourself here.

Oh, oh.  I didn't mean to aggravate a supervillain, but in the quest for literary truth and justice, I forged ahead.

I may be confused (or maybe not), but either Vordak is brave or he's nuts.  What's the word for "evil bravery" or "evilly brave"?

Well, Vordak is certainly confident in his encyclopedic knowledge of evil, and if he isn't going to rule the world on his own, he's certain to ride another evildoer's coattails.

Trustworthy and humble.  See for yourself at Vordak's blog.  I figured it was about time to wrap up our conversation.  It has stretched out over a week, and annoying a supervillain isn't high on anyone's to-do list, when ...

Right.  A few hundred suspects.  Put the most suspicious in a lineup and all that would fit in the room behind the mirrored glass would be Vordak and his helmet.  Seems my suspicions of annoying a supervillain were right on.  It was time to wrap it up.

And with that, the absolutely, positively, highest recommendation ever given to a book [whose author has launched thinly-veiled threats in my direction] on this website goes to How to Grow Up and Rule the World by Vordak the Incomprehensible!


  1. Very, very impressive! I'm talking about me, not the interview. MUAHAHAHAHA!!

  2. Have you ever considered changing your name to Vordak the Humble? Or Vordak the Meek, maybe? How about Vordak the Mild-Mannered?

    Nah. Vordak the Incomprehensible is perfect. After all, there are certain things many of us will never comprehend about your incomprehensibleness.


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